


Lucifer's kiss

by Jassanja



Category: Apocalyptica, Nightwish
Genre: AU, Crossoverver, M/M, Obsession, Sexual Identity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-04
Updated: 2009-12-04
Packaged: 2017-10-04 04:00:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jassanja/pseuds/Jassanja
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eicca has an obsession, and Emppu has to find his sexual identity</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lucifer's kiss

**Author's Note:**

> written in 2005, slightly edited in 2009 for the AO3

(1)

"This will be so cool", Perttu was basically bouncing along the walkway to the small club. He was so excited about the concert they were going to see.

"I am not so sure about that." Even with his longer legs Eicca had a hard time to keep up with his wild friend. "I don't even know why I let you talk me into coming along with you again. Really, who is crazy enough to put Metal and Opera together? This just can't work without hurting our ears or breaking beer bottles."

"Hear, hear! And this coming from the man who insisted on playing Metallica on his cello." Perttu stuck out his tongue in Eicca's direction. "There are people who would call that crazy too, you know! So keep your mind open, and you have come along because you don't want to risk me going anywhere alone and get hurt!" This was followed by the batting of his eyelashes.

"Don't act like a brat, Pera!" But the smile tugging at Eicca's lips softened his harsh words. Yes, he would enjoy this night, if not for the band, who's name he had already forgotten again, then because of the time spent with Perttu. Despite his sometimes odd likings in music it was always fun going out with the younger one. And all the shitty bands they had seen on such occasions served at least for good bad examples on how Apocalyptica should never be seen on stage.

Half an hour later they stood in the middle of the crowd, bottles of beer in their hands. But Perttu was already moving again.

"Where are you going?" asked Eicca.

"Up front of course! Only old ladies hang around in the back, not cool rockers like me! Are you coming?"

"Just for the record, I don't think that this is a good idea!" Still Eicca followed him with a long suffering sigh.

At last Perttu came to a halt slightly on the right, and only a few rows back from the front. "This will be perfect" he grinned at Eicca, who just nodded and hoped that they would not end up in the middle of a mosh pit. He needed his and Perttu's bones in good order for the next recording session.

***

Later Eicca could not remember much, beside that it was a way better gig than he had dared to hope.

Nightwish's music had struck his liking from right from the start. Almost as soon as the first song had started he found himself locked in a death grip with Perttu, holding on each other for a bit of support as they joined the head banging in almost the same moment, pretty much ignoring the operatic voice of that chick, that fit in so well, instead of breaking bottles.

It wasn't until a good time later when a slower song was played, that Eicca actually remembered to take a good look at the band itself. He pushed his damp hair out of his face and started at the far end away from him by the keyboarder and went on to the others. Nothing special about the singer, or the other guys, he noted, but then his eyes fell onto the guitarist right in front of them.

Oh, now he was nice to look at! Why hadn't he noticed him sooner? Oh yes, to busy creating that mosh pit he had feared so much!

Broad shoulders, nice arms, agile fingers, and judging from those wide stands really firm legs as well. A bit on the short side perhaps, but besides from that, just the way Eicca liked it, especially since the long blonde hair could rival his own, or would in a few years at last.   
Now that he had spotted this beauty, Eicca was practically unable to look away from him again. Even as the energy got back, both on stage as well as in the crowd, he was dumb-struck, standing amid the mass of struggling bodies, staring transfixed at the guitar player.

His behaviour must really have been strange, for it had gained Perttu's notice that something was wrong. He began to snap his fingers right in front of his face, but to no avail, only when he started to pull on Eicca's hair did he gain a reaction in the form of a startled head jerk.

"What?"

"Are you ok?" Perttu asked.

"Fine!" Eicca's answer was terse, his gaze was already fixed on the stage again.

"You sure you aren't bored?"

"Far from it!" This was mumbled so low, Perttu could almost not hear it at all, but he let it rest. It seemed as if Eicca liked it so far, and was not attempting to flee the place. Besides, Perttu was certainty not going anywhere as this was one of the most entertaining evenings he had had in a long time without standing on stage himself.

***

"Do you know the names of the band members?" Eicca asked nonchalantly after they were back on the way to his car. He wrapped himself deeper into his jacket, but had no clue why he was still so sweaty, even after only standing around for the better part of the concert.

"The singer is Tarja", then Perttu had to think for a moment. "Tuomas is the one who writes all their songs, if I'm not to mistaken then he was that guy on the keyboards. But the others," he shrugged. "no clue! But who cares as long as the music is so fucking fantastic!"

Eicca nodded absent-mindedly. Perttu was, once again, no real help. He would have to wait a bit longer and do some research into them himself.

 

(2)

 

Eicca's task of researching the name of his new obsession turned out to be easy and simple.  
It seemed as if Perttu had not been the only one who liked in the unique Nightwish style, and the band became a top seller in and outside of Finland. Information about them was everywhere. Even if most journalists preferred to keep their eyes and texts on Tarja, the face, and Tuomas the soul of the band, Eicca found out more about their guitarist as well.

Emppu was his name, and much to Eicca's amusement, this was, just as his own musical identity, a variation of his real name.

Yes, in his mind Eicca was sure that they would make a nice and sweet couple, if they would just get together. But he feared that Emppu was now way out of his league. What would a real rock star do with someone like him? He was perhaps a professional musician, but far from real success where everyone knew his name. But a man could dream, and Eicca was willing to do just that.

So he kept his eye on the band, hoping that it would not get to obvious that he did it mostly because of one member. One was not Tarja. He would never hear the end of it if anyone would find out. It would be his own fault of course, since he perhaps mocked Perttu once or twice to much about his rather loud wanking sessions that seemed to be inspired by the impressive siren.

So far the others only had noticed that he was taken with the band, and they automatically handed him over every paper or magazine that featured an article on Nightwish.

May it stay like this.

 

***

 

"Who is it?"

Surprised Eicca looked up at Paavo who was standing in front of his desk. He had not heard him come in.  
"Who is the one you are so taken with?" Paavo asked again. He supported himself on the surface of the desk and leaned slightly over it so he to had a good view of the picture in the magazine Eicca was reading.  
"I am not taken with anyone!" Eicca hurried to tell, slapping the magazine closed with one hand.

"Of course not", there was a clear streak of irony in Paavo's voice. "You just happened to stare dreamy eyed on that picture for the last minutes with no reason.You did not even notice me till yet." He stepped around the desk and this time he leaned in on Eicca, supporting himself on the others shoulder.   
"Whenever it comes to this band, you are acting strange Eino! And it is getting worse."

Silence

"I long suspected that you are not really that interested in the way their career hit the roof, to find a way to do the same with Apo. And as for the music ... from observations I can tell, that it is Perttu who has phases of absolute need to listen to their CDs all day long, not you. So I came to the conclusion, that it must be one of the musicians that holds your attention. One of the guys, if your rumbling about how everyone always only focus on the singer because she is a woman,. is any further indication."  
Paavo was close now, too close for comfort, and he was looking severely into Eicca's eyes.

"And now you blush!"

As if it would have not been worse enough to feel the heat in his face, Eicca could also see his reaction to this revelation way to clearly in the toned shades of Paavo's glasses.

"So I am! Who cares?" Eicca tried to shrug it of, and make Paavo move a bit further away from him, but to no success.  
"I care!"  
"You don't have to! It means nothing!"  
"Really? I don't believe it!"  
"Care to tell me why not?"  
"Two or three years is too long for a healthy little crush. You should know that yourself. You will not like to hear it, but I have to say it anyway. Eicca, you are obsessed!"

If Paavo waited for an dismissive answer, he hid his disappointment well. Eicca just sighed and gave a small nod.

Deep in his subconsciousness he had known this himself, but there had never been the need to admit it until now. Hearing Paavo speak it out made it real however.

"Do you have an idea what I can do against it?" Eicca said at long last.  
"Forget him!"  
"You make this sound so easy, but how will I be able to do so?"  
"Stop oogling your eyes out over pictures would be a good start!" this time Paavo smiled down, then, finally, backed off a step. "Just out of curiosity, have you ever talked to him?"  
Again Eicca blushed. "No, just some passing comments to Jukka and Tuomas on one of those "I pat your shoulder, and you mine-parties."

Paavo scowled. "I'm really missing a trend here, but who is who in that band anyway?" He flapped the magazine on the desk back open and searched for that Nightwish picture that Eicca had been drooling over sooner. "Care to enlighten me?"

"Jukka, drums; Tarja, vocals; Tuomas, the key boarder: Marco the bassist who also does some vocals, and Emppu the guitarist" Eicca pointed them out for his friend.

"I see! Now that we can cancel out half of the band, let me guess, who your sweetheart is!"  
At this Eicca growled, but Paavo only slightly lifted an eyebrow. "See, that reaction is the thing we need you to loose!" Then he turned his eyes back to the picture. "Are you sure, you pointed me the right ones out? Neither of those two seem to be fitting for you. One looks too old, the other like he is half a meter shorter than you! This Tuomas would be more your type!"

"Thanks for the advise on my love life, but I guess I know better who attracts me", Eicca got now a little sarcastic. "Besides that it was you who wanted to guess. Its Emppu if you must know!"  
Paavo took another look at the picture, before closing the magazine again. "Not that is matters anymore! You are going to forget him, and I will see to that! Let's go and get some dinner, since that was the reason I wanted to see you in the first place. And you surely made me wait for it long enough as it is."

(3)

 

From that day on Paavo would no longer pass papers or magazines, and every time Perttu would do so, he would shoot a disappointed look at Eicca, who would lay it down without as much as a glance or a comment towards it.

Paavo would also hold Eicca occupied during times the younger man would get moody and brooding. He would drag him for walks outdoors or to watch some serious cultural things, such as art galleries with pictures they would not understand, and later have a laugh over.

Paavo saw Eicca making some progress but he also knew that it was way too soon for Eicca to be truly over his obsession, that would make many of his own fans pale with envy.

And after all, there was no need to hurry things along, they had all the time in the world!

Or so Paavo thought...

 

***

Eicca pout down the sheets of paper in front of Paavo and Perttu. "Our bookings for this festival season just got in" he announced, and they looked at it.

Suddenly Perttu yelped. "Oh this is going to be neat!" He flapped the page in front of Eicca's face. "Guess who will be playing on the same day as us on this one?"

"Pray tell! I'm not in the mood for guessing games, and I am not sure, I remember every obscure band you currently taken with"

"That may be true, but for this, they are not so obscure, and certainly not to you. I'm talking about Nightwish here!"

"Oh!" at this Eicca paled.

"Now that is not the reaction I expected from you. I thought you like their music", Perttu looked at him with a frown.

"I do like their music, I just don't know if I am ready to run into them backstage!"

"Damn me if I understand what you are trying to say!" Perttu said with a shake of his head.

"You don't have too, since I understand Eicca, so get over it!" Paavo stretched out his hand to lay it on Eicca's arm. "You will manage just fine. Just concentrate on our playing and if that fails you can still grab my hand for support."

Perttu was now pouting. "There is something going on that you clearly hold me out of. Just go on and hurt my feelings."

"Don't be a brat, Perttu, it is not all always about you. This time it is Eicca that needs help, but no wonder he won't tell you, if you can't accept that other people can get stressed out too."

"I know that other people can get stressed out. Other people! Not Eicca! Eicca is never stressed out!"

"Obviously he is now."

"Stop talking as if I am not here!" All power had drained out of Eicca's voice, and this came as barley more than a whisper. He took a few heavy gulps of air, before he pulled himself together. "Neither of you has to fear for me. Perttu, it's not such an important thing, so don't go crazy with finding out what is wrong with me, because their will be nothing wrong anymore on the day it will count. And you Paavo, don't fret, I'll manage this!" With this words he got up, and left the room, all but certain about what he just told them.

***

And so time went on, the festival season came and the concerts went smoothly, without anthingy more out of order as all the years before. On the outside Eicca appeared no different then ever, but inwards he was a nervous wreck.

The evening before the day of THAT festival he paced holes into the carpet of his house.   
He didn't even dare to talk to Paavo this time. Afraid that perhaps he was not really over his obsession, and that Paavo just talked it into him that there was nothing anymore. What if there still was something? What if he still was attracted to Emppu?

"Oh stop this, you idiot!" he yelled to himself at one point.

Who said that they would even see the members of Nighwish? Those festivals had wider backstage areas than concert halls or clubs. Yes, it was easy to avoid someone there. He could avoid them, and not go insane in the process.

The picture of him hiding behind a trash can to avoid Emppu came unbidden to his mind. Was that pathetic or really funny? Should he cry or rather laugh hysterically? In the end he did both, before grabbing the bottle of vodka and find his way to his bed to share the night with it.

 

(4)

They had arrived on the festival site a bit late, a radio interview beforehand had taken longer than it had been scheduled, and they had to go on stage almost the minute they left the bus. Still, the gig had gone over just as well. But then they had always an enthusiastic crowd this days, no matter how bad they would play. That was another side of the coin if you hit the top of the business.

When they finally got a minute of peace Emppu collapsed in a chair between Jukka and Tero. "This is insane!" he announced.

"Sure, that's why we love it", Tero answered.

Emppu was inclined to nod in agreement, when his gaze fell onto a passing group of musicians.

"I thought that this was a rock festival? So why is this classic group here?"

Across from him Tuomas turned and followed Emppu's gaze. "Oh, they! As much as I know they play metal, just on their own way. Not that I have heard much of it, but they are not that bad."

"Ah well, as long as they have someone with such a nice ass in the group, they could play flute with ice cream sticks for all I care. Emmpu tried to watch around the tall form of Tuomas to get a better view of the ass in question.

So did Jukka, and after a moment he was starting to giggle. Tero joined in just a moment later. Emppu ignored them. They always found the oddest things funny after they had a few beers. Long ago he learned to either ignore or join them. Today was one of the ignore days.

He kept his gaze on the spot behind Tuomas head, and just hoped that the pretty blonde chick with that fantastic arse and the beautiful long blond hair would not move away without turning around and giving him a chance to see her face.

Even if she wouldn't be so pretty from up front, he could still try to get her between the sheets. Nobody had made up the rule that he had to look at her face while fucking her.

"Hey, Emppu, I didn't know that you're gay!"

Jukka's words got Emppu out of his daydream, in which he had the blonde already on her knees in front of him. For a moment he was about to ask how Jukka got to know what was playing in his mind and tell him that the was not going to fuck her ass, but then he registered the key word in that sentence.

"Of course I am not gay! What gives you the impression?"

"Perhaps the way you are undressing that poor guy with your eyes for minutes now!"

Emppu's eyes flew wide open. "Are you telling me that this blond beauty is not a girl?"

Jukka's giggling got louder as he leaned in on Tero and placed an arm around his shoulders. His words came as a faked stage whisper, loud and clearly enough for Emppu to hear. "The Pixie didn't know that he checked out a guy!"

"He would have found out pretty soon when chatting him, or shall we say her, up", was the just as faked whisper back from Tero.

Emppu was ignoring them again,shocked, looking once again over to the group that had choosen the place just behind Tuomas to chat with some people from the festival administration.

"This just can't be a guy" Emppu muttered.

"And why not?" Tuomas was leaning over the small table. While he was not outwardly laughing there was amusement blinking in his eyes.  
"Too beautiful, even only from the back."

"Pretty, look who's talking!" Tuomas teased him. "I remember meeting him somewhere. Looks a bit on the feminine side from the front too, but the voice is down in the valley."

"I still don't believe it. I can feel it down my back that you are making a joke out of me. Just because I am not in every wild thing that you guys have going, you don't need to plan to get me on the loose side. I can be wild too, I just don't want to."

Jukka and Tero stopped their bantering and giggling, and Tero was taking Emppu in his arm. "Wanna make a bet to show us your wild side, Pixie? We go now over there, say hello, so that you can see it up close and personal yourself, that you have been checking out a guy. And if it turns out that he really is a girl, you can invite her to dinner, and I'll pay for it."

"Of course I am in. I don't let you make a fun pull on me this time around, so keep your wallet at hand, you will need it." With that Emppu was on his feet. "Let's go over!"

(5)

 

"Hi guys. I thought that we should come over and say hi!"

The blonde Emppu had been watching spun around, and the first thing Emppu had to do was to look up, and up, and then up some more. And then he took as step back as his gaze finally reached the others face.

It was a very delicate one, even if something about it was striking Emppu as a bit odd, but he couldn't put a finger on what was off exactly. And yes, it was a bit on the male side too.

"Hope you still remember me from that party once? And Emppu here wanted to meet you guys." Tuomas was still babbeling on and while doing so he gave Emppu a tap on the shoulder as if to stress his words.

"Hi", the blonde spoke, while obviously trying to find some words. It seemed as if there was something that had surprised him, and it wasn't a good surprise. The intensity with which those blue eyes shone down on Emppu was also rather unsettling. One of the other guys from the group, the one with short dark hair, gave the blonde a not so subtle elbow shove into the ribs, and this made those eyes search for something else to look upon. In the end they settled on Tuomas' face that was on about the same high level.

"Good to see you too again... ehm.. Tuomas, right?"

The last reservations Emppu had melted, there was no question about gender when you heard that voice. Deep and rather booming. Disappointment mingled with fascination, and Emppu's curiosity would not let go of it.

Meanwhile Tuomas smiled and nodded. "Sorry, I should have introduced us all. Yes, I am Tuomas, this little pixie here is Emppu, as I already said, and those other two morons are Jukka and Tero." Tuomas pointed them out over his shoulder.

The others introduced themselfs as well, and in the end the blonde, Eicca, stretched his hand out to Emppu, who just took it.  
And then something strange happened.

Eicca held onto his hand to long for any normal handshake, that much was clear, but the circling of his thumb against the back of Emppu's hand was something he wouldn't have had expected. This was far from something one would think a stranger would do to your hand. Emppu knew that he had to pull his hand back sometime, and he did it carefully, slowly, reculantly. As soon as he lost the contact he felt odd, empty and as if his skin tingled where it had been touched.

Why this oddnes? And was it really odd, or was he enjoying it?

And why did he want it to continue?

 

***  
"What the fuck was that?" Paavo used all the body force he could muster, and that coud be a lot, to shove Eicca against the wall built out of wooden planks.

Breath escaped harshly out of Eicca's lungs at the sudden impact.

"What?" he was puzzled.

"You heard me! What got into you? Did you forget your promise to forget him?" Paavo took a step back, but was sill impossibly close to Eicca, giving him space to breath but not enough to move.

"In case you did not notice, I was just polite after THEY came up to us. It would not have made a good impression if I would have run away without reason."

"Since when does being polite include kidnapping ones hand, when all they expect is the shake thereof?"

Eicca just frowned back.

"Oh yes, my friend, you were way over the line between polite and groping. Keep it together,man! We really don't need a scandal to our name"

Eicca watched as Paavo took a few more steps back, so he was finally able to move from the makeshift wall himself. But his eyes stayed on Paavo. And then they got open wide as realisation hit.

" There is more than just your fear of a scandal." A statement not a question. Eicca crossed his arms in front of his body, and he was now glaring at Paavo. "So it is my turn to ask, what the fuck is up with you?"

"Nothing! I am just concerned for you!"

"Yeah, sure! There is something you keep from me, and I can smell it", Eicca was now almost growling, and it was on him, to advance on Paavo with an air that indicated that something was about to happen. Be it good or bad, he would not be able to tell it himself right now

"Eicca, don't be silly now!" There was a note of defence in Paavo's voice, just giving Eicca the hint that there really was something untold. Eicca pushed his hands down on the others shoulder, using less force, only the advantage of high to look intimidating.

"Spill it! Are you jealous? Do you want Emppu for yourself? Is that it, and are you jealous now because because I saw him first? Because I had the nerve to touch or as you put it, grope him?"

Paavo looked up at Eicca. First with wonderment, then amusement.

"Are you really thinking that?"

"Yes, you give me this impression."

"Then it's even more silly, than you thinking that you would have more of a right to have him, just because you had the crush first."

Eicca's face was going red, Paavo could not really make out if it was out of shame or anger. Paavo moved his own hands to hold the others arms. Preventing him from hitting him, or moving away. He also used the grip to push himself up, and plant a kiss square on Eicca's lips.

"I don't want Emppu, and if I am jealous, then because I saw YOU first. So in your way of thinking you should be mine!"

He slightly pushed his dumb struck band mate away, let go of his own hold on him, and walked away.

 

(6)

 

"You know, you lost that bet. What will you do now to save your honour?" Tero was leaning over Emppu's seat in the bus.

"Hmmm....," Emppu, who had been looking out of the window, lost in thoughts, looked up. "What do you have in mind?" he asked.

Tero's smile was widening, and just then Emppu realized what a big mistake he had just made. No one in their right mind would let Tero lay down the terms of a bet, he was just too crazy, and if someone let him choose, they usually ended up doing things no person right in mind would ever, ever do. He should have known better and been a bit more careful but there were things on his mind right now that just confused him too much for comfort.

"I take it that you are still thinking about that pretty lady that turned out to be a guy?" It was not apparent whether Tero was teasing or was having one of his rare serious streaks. But what could one do with a heart full and no one to talk to about things men were not supposed to feel? The only option was to spill it to the first person who gives enough shit to notice that something was really wrong.

"And if I am? Would that be so wrong?"

"Nah!" Tero made a flipping motion with his hands. "That guy had his eyes all over you anyway, so it would be nothing more than mutual interest"

Emppu's eyes flew open. "He... what?"

"He was as good as undressing you with his eyes!"

"I am not in the mood for teasing, so stop that Tero!"

"I am not teasing. I am serious for once. Don't tell me that you didn't notice it yourself." Tero was now sitting down next to Emppu, looking at the younger one with sombre eyes.

"No, I didn't!" Emppu averted his gaze.

"Then why mope? I guessed that you were upset that a guy would look at you, especially with that kind of gaze"

Emppu blushed and averted his eyes further, wishing it would not be so obvious if he took the ribbon out of his ponytail, to hide behind the curtain of his hair. "I had this stupid idea that there had been more to that handshake then there should have been, and I liked it!"

Tero blinked. "Well then everything should be fine. But it doesn't look like you see it the same way."

"But I am not gay!"

"Says who?" Tero raised an eyebrow questioningly.

Emppu frowned, but then seemed to think this over. "But I like girls!"

"Apparently you like guys as well!" Tero grinned.

A wild shake of head, then: "But that is not possible!"

Tero laid a hand on the others shoulder before he spoke again. "Actually, it is. Please don't tell me, that you've never heard of it before, that one can like both genders without problems?"

"Yeah, I did, but I am not someone who does that."

"I would think that over if I were you. Perhaps you may want to change your opinion."

"I don't think so!"

"Whatever, mate. Your broken heart!" Tero shrugged. "I will leave you alone then. And no, I didn't forget that you still owe me that bet. I just think it's not the right time for it."

Emppu looked very sceptical as Tero got up again, but Tero saw it anyway.

"What? You're surprised that I CAN be sensible if I choose to?"

"Ehm... yes?"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk, today's youth! Of course I can, just most of the time I don't want to be sensible. I have a reputation to maintain after all. And because of this I hope that our little talk here will stay our secret... or else the price for the bet will be really nasty, I'll promise you that!"

"Don't worry, your sensible side will stay a secret with me, if you keep my secrets just as safe."

"There, we have a deal mate!" Tero petted Emppu's shoulder one last time, then turned away in the hope to find someone else he could annoy.

***

Tuomas raised his eyebrow at Tero's suggestion. "You really think that this is a good idea? We may shock him to death with this!"

"He will survive it. And believe me, he has to see it, it will do him good!"

"I don't know what you are thinking this time, but I guess since you got Jukka on your side already, I'd better go along with you two as well. Even if only to save the pixie should things get out of hand."

"They won't!" Tero leaned over and pressed a kiss on Tuomas' lips. "Thank you for this, thank you!"

 

(7)

It wasn't until two weeks later that Tero could bring his plan to action.

The guys had a night out at a bar and ended up fairly pissed. Stumbling out to the street they clutched at each other, and it wasn't sure to see who was supposed to support whom.

It did not take much persuasion from Tero to have everyone agree that it would be for the best if they spend the rest of the night at his place together.

They gathered in the living room and more cans of beer got handed out. After two rounds Tero suddenly got up and fumbled around on his TV set. "Let's watch some porn," he announced.

That earned him some cheering from Jukka and Tuomas while Emppu was making a face. "Not again, don't we have to see enough of this in the tour bus?"

Jukka scouted closer to him and laid an arm around his shoulder. "You can never watch enough porn if you're a rock star. Besides, Tero has some really good stuff here. Stuff that we can't watch in the bus, because Tarja and some of the others would get kittens if they saw it. But tonight we want to share it with you. Give it at last a try, you may enjoy it after all."

Sighing heavily Emppu nodded. Jukka grinned drunkenly and moved even closer his arm still around the smaller guy. If this irritated Emppu he didn't show it.

Tuomas was almost laying stretched out on the other sofa opposite of them, and as soon as Tero found the movie he wanted and had it in the player, he took a place less beside then more atop of Tuomas, and started the tape with the help of his remote control.

Jukka could feel the hard intake of breath from Emppu when the first images of the movie came across the screen. Jukka smiled to himself as the two guys on the screen started kissing, glad to notice that Emppu was not running out the door. It looked like Tero's plan could work out.

To ease the remaining tension in Emppu's shoulders Jukka started to rub his fingers in small circles over the muscles. He hoped that it worked and that the goose bumps that woke under his finger tips were a good sign.

Emppu was still staring at the screen in silence. Perhaps to shocked about what he saw, perhaps fascination by it. Somehow it was almost too bad that he did not take a closer look at his surroundings. Everything in the room had changed once the tape was playing. Only a short distance away from him Tuomas and Tero engaged in a snog fest. But Jukka watched it for a few moments, getting a good idea of how to get a reaction out of the pixie. No matter how nice that particular movie was, it still lacked all the fun one could get from the real thing.

Jukka moved his fingers into Emppu's hair to swipe it out of the way, then leaned closer until his lips almost touched the others neck, his breath caressing the skin.

Now Emppu was moving, trying to look over his shoulder but all the movement did was closing the distance and press his neck against those lips.A shudder ran down his spine and he had to take a sharp breath. Impulse told him that he should pull away, but in the same moment Jukka's arms closed tighter around him pulling their bodies even closer, while at the same time those soft lips opened and the tongue slipped over his skin in a short wet lick.

"Oh!"

It was a soft sound that came from his throat, and all the urge to move away was gone. Instead he leaned closer against Jukka and his examining lips, his eyes falling shut, his body going soft to the sensation.  
Who cared by whom he just got snogged, he certainty liked to have his neck licked. So why fight if someone was just doing it?

The tongue moved up until it played along the shell of Emppu's ear. This brought out another shudder.  
The warmth of a second set of hands appeared on his thighs, moving higher.

"It's not thad bad, now is it?" Tero asked softly.

Emppu's eyes flew open; looking down at Tero who was on the floor right before him. Suddenly reality hit and Emppu tried to wriggle away from Jukka and Tero, but found himself trapped between them.

"It meant nothing! I just like that. No matter who's doing it!" Emppu hurried to explain.

"Yeah sure," Tero said with a hint of sarcasm, but there was still a bigger part of a seducing purr in his voice. In time to his words his hand moved up even further on Emppu's leg until it brushed up against a unmistakable erection.

"So you don't want us taking care of this?"

This time he squeezed it through the fabric, with a little more force.

"No," was the answer, but Emppu's hips moved up and into the touch as if to state a yes.

"Don't be afraid, it will do you good!" The purring was now in full effect, Teros voice was pure seduction.

"No, I don't want you touching me" Emppu beat the hands off his betraying body.

"Well then, as you wish." Slowly Tero got up and moved away. "But please, at last watch the show. And if you change your mind, just tell, we won't mind."

Tero grinned and was back at Tuomas' side in a heartbeat, knowing that his touch would be more then welcome there. They continued where they stopped.

Jukka fumbled for the remote and switched the TV out, making sure Emppu had nothing to   
distract him from the main show.

Emppu had to admit to himself that he liked what he saw. Liked it too much for his own comfort, but he stayed on Jukka's side through it all. The passionate kissing, the tearing off of clothes, the licking and nibbling of mouths along bodies.

And he didn't like the whimper that escaped him, as he saw how Tuomas' cock vanished between a pair of eager lips.

But at the moment it became clear to him, that he was just seconds away from witnessing some real ass fucking, involving two men he still would have to work with in the future, he got up, groped for his coat and fled into the cold streets.

 

(8)

It is impressive, how things can get stuck in someones mind, once one has seen them up close. Even if they knew how it would look before they saw it. But it is hard to ignore things that have so suddenly become real. And for Emppu the boy touching had become a real thing, a very real thing.

Never had he had the slightest suspicion of the things his bandmates did when there wasn't everyone present, but now he did not even have to look closely to notice. A harmless touch turned into more and a slight smile could become a promise.

Emppu saw how they paraded their affair right in front of everyone's eyes; and even if he would never see them do those things again, his mind would always show him the memories in vivid and colourful images. Emppu could sometimes feel his pulse speed up just from imagining the things Tuomas, Tero and Jukka could be doing right then, while he was alone at his house, plugging a few chords on the guitar.

Yes, if he admitted it to himself, he was jealous. Not because he wanted to be a part of it with them, but he wanted to have something of his own. Something he could parade right in front of their noses, so that they could see that they were wrong about him - he needed a non gay thing.

*********

Things started to go terribly wrong on a day like any.

Emppu was reading the newspaper; and apparently Apocalyptica had given a gig around the town the night before, and there was a short report, topped by a picture.

Emppu didn't read more then the headline, and gave the picture a short look before he went on to the next page, checking the lottery numbers. While he was turning the page he wondered about how nice it would be to lick over that slight peak of nipple, that Eicca showed in that shot.

Emppu mentally paused, shook his head and went back to the other page, lotto numbers forgotten. Where had that thought come from? Of course he would not want to do that.

This time he took a closer look at the picture. No, nothing he wanted to lick. He preferred bigger nipples on even bigger breasts, real tits, thank you very much.

He rumpled the paper into a tight ball, tossed it into the thrash can and got up to get his jacket. Time to go to a bar and find a nice girl to fuck.

 

*********

 

He didn't find a suitable young lady that night, or at least not one that seemed to be the right one for the night.

He got close enough to two girls to find a few kisses and get a good grope on a pair of tits that where about the size he was searching for, but when it was time to bring the girl home to show her his guitar collection, he found himself unable to do so, and went home alone.

As he was laying in his bed, once again the picture of a topless Eicca came to mind in front of his inner eye.

The chest that shimmered with sweat, nipples turned into hard peaks, just asking to be licked, sucked or rolled with his lips.  
Emppu could even feel the ghost of them pressing against his mouth. He moaned in disappointment when he couldn't find anything to lick, once he gave in to the image and opened his lips.

When his mind was clearer, he could feel his heart beating faster in his chest, he knew that his breath had to be faster and shallower too, and that his cock was laying heavy and pulsing against his belly, chafing against the otherwise soft fabric of the trainer pants he wore to bed.

It was the perfect moment to admit at least to himself, that yes, he was attracted to Eicca.

But didn't the thought of touching another man like that disgust him? A mental check, and yes, it still was like that. But he did not want to touch any man, he wanted Eicca, and touching him would not be disgusting.

What about kissing him?

No problem either, even with tongue it couldn't be much different from kissing a girl. Just a bit more stubble perhaps.

And his mind as well as his body had just told him that they would not mind exploring a hard chest or a quivering belly  
.  
And what about the .... more southern parts? Touching and kissing him there?

Emppu's mind screamed no, gave him blinking red lights and roadblock signs reading "Don't even go there!"

But down in his pants his cock gave another twitch, reminding him that it was still hard, still leaking, still in need of some attention.

Emppu slipped his hand down his pants and gave in to the pleasure, trying not to think of anything, and thankfully it worked good enough to bring him off.

"Guess I have to call him then", he muttered to himself while cleaning off the mess.

 

(9)

In the light of the day, and without the last remains of lust in his bloodstream, the promise about calling Eicca was easy to ignore, but the nagging little voice would not vanish from Emppu's mind over the day.

After he spent the day doing other necessary things, like mopping the kitchen floor, it was getting too late anyway to find out the number, let alone calling someone you didn't know.

Just then, there was a knock on the door.

Tero was standing there, a wide grin plastered over his face. He grabbed inside the pocket of his pants, and held out a crumpled piece of paper to Emppu.

"Here!" he said.

Emppu took the paper and all he found on it was a column of numbers written down in Tero's attempt at a neat script.

"I thought that you would need it one day, so I asked around. Just keep it in case you want to call your sweety sometime. I need to go now, Tuomas is waiting," and with that Tero was gone as suddenly as he had come, before Emppu could make up his mind if he wanted to hit or hug him.

*********

Clutching the piece of paper in his hands Emppu looked at the phone. All he had to do now was picking it up and dial before he got too nervous. He took three deep breaths, then did it. But he needed five tries until he finally pushed the number in right.

One ring, surly no one would pick up this soon. The second and the third went, and his hands got damp. At the fifth Emppu was ready to hang up, but then there was an answer.

*Hmmm?"

Was this Eicca or someone else? Anyway, he had to talk or the other would hang up. He would just assume that it was the right person.

"Ehm.... hi, this is Emppu Vourinnen! Remember me? I guess not. We meet some time ago on a festival. I am the guitarist of Nightwish"

Vittu, he was babbling shit. He needed to stop it.

"Err.... yes, I remember!"

He did? Emppu forgot everything else he wanted to say.

...

"Is there a reason why you...."

"You may wonder why I ...."

Oh shit, was there something as embarrassing as talking at the same time the other did? Emppu was glad that Eicca could not see his blush.

"Well, I call because I would like to... talk to you in person about .. things!"

Now how stupid did that sound? More like a little kid then a grown man.

"Things? Like music?"

"No... ehm... other things"

"Fine with me, talking about other things. When?"

Eicca agreed? Wow, wonderful.

When the receiver was back on the cr addle he slumped down in a chair.

He had really called him, and Eicca had really agreed to see him. Emppu did not know if he should be happy and bouncing around the room, or be ashamed because he made such an idiot out of himself with that explanation to why he wanted to meet.

 

*********

The ringing of the phone snapped Eicca out of concentration.

"Hmmm?" Everyone who had this number knew better than to expect him giving more vocal answers when calling him first.

"Ehm.... hi, this is Emppu Vourinnen! Remember me? I guess not. We meet some time ago on a festival. I am the guitarist of Nightwish"

The words came in such a fast rush from the other side that Eicca had quite some problems taking them all in.  
"Err.... yes, I remember!"

Stupid answer, of course he would remember Emppu and that festival. But why was he calling? It was just not something Eicca had expected.

...

"Is there a reason why you...."

"You may wonder why I ...."

Inwardly Eicca winced. Talking at the same time was just too embarrassing. He stopped to allow Emppu to explain.

"Well, I call because I would like to... talk to you in person about .. things!"

Things?

"Things? Like music?"

But that would make no sense, Tuomas made all of Nightwish's musical decisions.

"No... ehm... other things"

Other Things? Like buying a house with a white picket fence and a dog? Yes, of course, he would like to talk about that. Oh, that was a stupid thing to even think about, at least he had not said it out loud.

"Fine with me, talking about other things. When?"

On a close piece of paper Eicca wrote down the time and address Emppu told him, ruining a new notation in the process without noticing.

After the call he almost fell to the floor, as he almost missed the chair, but that could not dismiss his silly smile.

(10)

The next day Eicca was sitting at a table in a bar, watching with damp palms and a fluttering stomach as Emppu entered the room.

They sat opposite each other for a while, didn't speak a word, but found interesting spots to stare at, just as long as they didn't have to interact with each other.

"Ehm .... you said that there was something that you wanted to talk about?" Eicca finally asked after the second round of beers got drowned.

After a deep breath Emppu answered without looking at Eicca: "Yes, I wanted to do that, but now that we're here, I can't find the right words." And that just was it. He had spent the time since the call on the evening before, to think about how he could explain what he was feeling, but since he did not even know it really himself, he could even less put it into words.

Emppu took another deep gulp of beer number three, and then decided that it was perhaps for the best to just tell out what he made up for himself.

"Since I first saw you at the festival, I knew that there was something about you that fascinated me, but until now I could not figure out what it was, and that got on my nerves." Emppu saw that Eicca was about to interrupt his words, so he just hold up his hand to stop him form speaking. "Please, don't speak just yet. I asked you to meet me today, so I would have a second chance to have a real look at you. Perhaps the nag in my mind was because you reminded me of someone, but now I see, that it isn't that. And I just keep wondering about it. Perhaps we can spend some more time together, so that I can figure this out, if you don't mind."

Now Eicca was confused. This blast of words could mean almost everything. Friendship, a fling, a real chance at love, it was all possible.

"Well .... I guess we can become friends."

It sounded silly to Eicca even as he said the words. He had never made a friendship like this, it just wasn't a natural approach, but more like a thing a teenager would do. Usually you just had a drink or two, got to know each other, and if you spent enough time together you became friends without that you ever had to speak the words out loud

Emppu smiled wide enough to show teeth, all nervousness gone from him, making him look more relaxed.

"Thanks"

The smile sent a shiver down Eiccas spine, but he could not help himself to more than to smile back. Perhaps it wasn't so bad to feel like a teenager again after all.

"Now that this is clear, perhaps we could talk about music anyway to break the ice?"

*****

As time went Eicca got more and more the impression that Emppu did not intend for their relationship to become romantic or even sexual. When they were together they did nothing different from what Eicca was doing with his other friends.

What once had been the dream lover of his sleepless nights turned into a real person, just as human as everyone else, with all the faults. As Eicca learned, Emppu had a bad temper that could even rival Perttu's

But all these discouraging truths could not quench the need to press the younger one hard against his own body, bruise his lips with kisses or fantasize how Emppu would look if he where flat on his back in Eicca's bed.

Several weeks after they had come to their understanding, Emppu managed to surprise Eicca.

They had spent the evening together watching a movie or two, and now made snarky comments about a documentary they had found on some obscure channel.

There was no plan, but Emppu knew he needed to do something, now, or there would be no other chance.

The remote control fell "accidently" to the floor, and Emppu leaned over Eicca's legs to get it back. Basically an innocent move, but within heart beats Emppu was no longer just leaning over him, but shifted to directly sit on Eiccas lap.

Eicca was looking up at him, and surprise made way for ... love? desire? hunger? All of it?

Emppu's plan had worked, but now he did not know how to go on, since this was as far as he had thought about it, as he just remembered.

Thankfully he didn't need another plan, since Eicca knew just what to do. He closed his arms around Emppu's waist, and locked him in place.

"Hello, beautiful," he muttered, barley to hear for Emppu. Meanwhile his hands glided into Emppu's hair, stroking it back but also getting a soft grip on the back of his head, bringing it down for a kiss

 

11)

Emppu relished the light kiss. Technically It really wasn't different from all other kisses he had gotten so far in his life. Emotionally he even liked the person who kissed him now, liked him a lot. And that was a step up from many of the other kisses.

Not thinking about much after that, he let Eicca coax his lips open to deepen the kiss. And that was when it got even better. At least as long as it lasted. Once the kiss was broken Emppu felt uncomfortable sitting on Eicca's lap, having the others face so close to his, and hearing that deep rumble of voice speaking to him so dark and personally.

"We should do that more often, that's fun," said Eicca with a hint of a smile.

A bit unsure Emppu smiled back. "It is.. its just a bit new"

"You never kissed before?" Eicca asked, half mocking, half concerned.

"I did, just never a guy" and after a moment, "never you!"

"No, never me," Eicca was now laughing out right. "You will get used to the guy part in general, and me in particular. You have to, since I plan to kiss you a lot more now." And as if to life up to his words Eicca once again pulled Emppu down in another kiss.

***

Later Emppu wasn't able to tell how much time had passed between those first kisses and the time he found himself on Eicca's bed, with half his clothes gone. There certainty wasn't enough time to panic when he noticed the lack of those, because Eicca was already pinning him down with his body, kissing him harder and more demanding then before.

Knowing only one way to react, Emppu's hands came to rest on Eicca's back, slowly gliding down. He moaned frustrated as he realised that he would be unable to reach the swell of buttocks, no thanks to their difference in heigh. Sensing Emppu's intend Eicca chuckled softly, rubbing his face against the skin of Emppu's neck.

"Not funn..." Emppu's protest was interrupted as an eager tongue swirled around a half-hard nipple. But before Emppu could get used to this new sensation Eicca had already shifted, bringing his backside in Emppu's reach.

"There you go".

Emppu was tempted to give Eicca's hair a hard pull as he heard that chuckle again, but settled for groping that ass, he had first noticed of the other. Just to find out, that perhaps he needed some glasses, as the ass in question wasn't that great to grope.

But that was easy to forget as he noticed that his pulling hands had also brought down Eicca's erection to press against his belly.  
It was a strange feeling, but it still exciting.

This wasn't like the night at Tero's, this time he had chosen to be in the situation. And now was the right time to prove to himself that he really wanted all of this.

Turning them over he slipped his hands between their bodies, and groped for Eicca's dick through the restraining fabric.

He sighed mentally in relive. That hadn't been difficult at all.

Now he just needed to get those pants open, and do it again. Skin to skin.

He managed to open all the buttons, and with only slightly shaking fingers he renewed his grip on Eicca.

The cock in his hands felt warm, so unbelievingly warm. While he didn't feel brave enough to look at it, he managed to stroke it, respectfully and with fascination. Until the erection started to wither under his caress.

Surprised Emppu opened his eyes and searched for Eicca's glance.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"You threat me like I am a science project. A nasty but exotic bug you have to touch, but can't look at. This isn't going to work."   
Eicca tried to keep his disgust out of his voice, but didn't manage it.

Gripping Emppu's hips he turned their bodies over once again. Holding Emppu pinned down with one hand, he used the other to open the others pants.

"I never kicked someone out of my bed without making sure they had their pleasure, and I am not going to start now!"

Without further ado Eicca took Emppu's prick between his lips, and sucked him off with a few practised flicks of tongue.

 

While Emppu was still a boneless heap on the bed, who tried to get his breath back, Eicca was already on his feet again and on his way out of the room.

"You should be going now, there is no sense in trying to make this work, when you can't deal with a cock other then your own."

 

(12)

After Emppu had left it became a long night, that Eicca spent mostly with lots of tossing and turning around in bed.

So it was no real surprise that Eicca didn't look very well when he got to the studio the next day.

He was insufferable and let his anger out on everyone who dared so much as breath too loud in his presence. At one point things got so bad that he almost strangulated Perttu with a broken string as punishment for a note played wrong.

It wasn't a wonder that everyone left as soon as they could; Perttu even pretended that he was needed at practice with the orchestra, just so he could get away from the studio sooner.

Eicca had shown him out, scowling at the obvious lie, just to find Paavo standing in the door frame, already waiting for his return.

 

"What was that all about? It isn't like you at all to let everyone pay, when you have a bad day. Has it anything do with that little bitch of yours? Did he get your pants in such a twist? Did he kick your ass out of his life before you had the chance to fuck him even once?"

Eicca wasn't sure what it was that woke his anger. Was it that Paavo had the nerve to mock him or that his words hit too close to home. How could he know anyway?

Eicca's fist hit the wooden door fame, hard, to avoid having to hit Paavo.   
"Did I hit a nerve here? Wouldn't you have enjoyed more to hit my face for calling your so called lover a bitch? " Paavo was smiling wide as he placed his hands over the fly of Eicca's pants, squeezing.

"Are your balls already bursting with need because the little tease doesn't let you fuck him?"

"How do you...." Eicca stopped mid sentence, but to late anyway. He knew that he just confirmed what Paavo had only suspected to this point.

"Stop this at once!" Eicca tried to keep the force of authority in his voice, but the effect failed as his cock grew harder under Paaavo's continued administrations.

"Looks like you are in need of a fuck... a good fuck with a real man."

Paavo's voice got silky, leaving no room for doubt who that man would be.

For Eicca lust mixed with anger and he groped for Paavos wrist, turned him around with force and pressed him face first up against the wall.  
"Think you're clever, don't you?

How long did you plot to find a way to get your dick up my ass? Taunting me, turning me on, all just so you cold have your way with me." With nimble fingers Eicca worked Paavo's pants open and down his thighs. "But you thought wrong my dear friend. That isn't the way it will be" With no further warning he slammed his own cock up Paavo's ass, and started to fuck him with a steady fast pace.

Soon Paavo was searching for something to brace himself on , but the smooth white-washed wall gave him nothing. So all he could do was to use his hands as a cushion to prevent his head from thumping directly into the wall as his body surrendered to the fight, and relaxed to become nothing but a device Eicca could use as an outlet of his frustration.

Minutes of wild, hard and uncontrolled rutting later Eicca finally spent himself and backed off of Paavo, but only long enough to reach around his waist to grip for Paavo's dick. He found it hanging limp and uninterested.

"But....," Eicca started to say, but a look at Paavo brought him to silence.  
"Accusing me of an evil plan, just to fall straight for the real one... your reactions are so easy to predict, my love." Paavo's words were spoken soft enough to prevent another surge of anger from Eicca.

"A blind man would have been able to see that something was wrong. You needed this," Paavo brushed a soft kiss against Eicca's lips before he reached out, laid his arms around Eicca's shoulders, let his fingers tangle with a long blonde strand of hair, that had fallen from its place behind Eicca's ear.

"So tell me know what went wrong with that guy."

And Eicca told him everything.

"So the whole time you just ignored that he wasn't used to bedding men, and you didn't expect to have to deal with a confussed virgin, so you kicked him out just as he acted with all rights as one?"

"Yes! And I would do it again. I am too old to deal with inexperienced lovers" Eicca answered honestly and buried his face on Paavo's shoulder.

Paavo's hands came up to pet the long silky hair and circle soothingly over Eicca's back.

"It's your full right to think so. But in that case you need someone else then Emppu."

"I know!" For a moment Eicca stared off into space, then moved to kiss Paavo hard.

For the length of a few heart beats Paavo let him, then used one hand against Eicca's shoulder to push him back.

"That's too fast!"

"Why?" there was hurt in both the rumbling deep voice as well as the oh so big blue eyes that looked at Paavo. "Didn't you say that I need someone else and that you would have me?"

"You come running in here hours after you told Emppu off and offer me everything I want. Ignore me forever and I will hold nothing against you, but I don't know how I could stand being your friend or even continue to work with you, should I find out that you are only playing with me now. This needs more time, I want to be sure you are really over your obsession"

 

(13)

Meanwhile:

After he spent the night tossing and turning in confussion, Emppu knew he needed to talk with someone. Someone who had nothing to do with all this mess he had gotten himself into. He needed to talk to Jukka. He would understand, and unlike Tero, Jukka would not mock him to hell and back.

He found his band mate outside of his house, just returning from a jogging trip.

"What brings you to me at such an early hour ?" Jukka wondered as he saw Emppu.

"Couldn't sleep. I need some advice about ... you know...."

"About that big blonde guy you got yourself, or about things you could do with said big blonde guy?"

So much for the no-mocking part thought Emppu as he followed Jukka inside. But he had gotten himself into this, now he had to stand his ground and act nonchalantly about it.

"Yes, some things that happened didn't work out as they should have, and that confuses me." And so Emppu told the story of the previous night.

Jukka had gotten them some cold drinks while he listened and was taking a deep gulp before he gave Emppu an answer.

"He doesn't want you for whom you are, but for someone he wishes you to be.

You have two choices now." Jukka gestured around,with the bottle still in his clasp. "You could pretend to be as he wishes, bold and wanton. It would of course only work if you could hide all the nerves and uncertainty you obviously feel." Jukka gave his friend a look that clearly told that he did not expect that Emppu could really pull it of with all the cool demeanor it would need to fool Eicca

"And the second possibility?" Emppu asked.

"Get over him!"

A few moments of silence passed before Emppu spoke again. "Looking at it as sober as this makes it pretty clear what I need to do, but ..."

"But what?"

"I needed so long to come to terms with myself that I indeed want to be touched by another guy. Now that I was so close to the reality of it, it is hard to give it up without acting on it." He slumped back in in his seat.

Jukka put his bottle down on the glass table between them, leaned slightly forward to look directly in Emppu's eyes, and unintentionally licked over his lips.

"No one said that you have to go back to your believe of heterosexuality just because you have to get that one guy out of your pretty head. Act on it all you want with someone else."

"But who would want me? As you said, I'm not self-confident enough to just pick up a man, like I would pick up a girl," Emppu looked sad as he said this, while Jukka could not hide a little chuckle.

"Do you really have to ask? Don't you remember that night as Tero's?"

Emppu nodded. "We were all drunk."

"Sure, but that doesn't make a difference. Do you think Tero and Tuomas are just getting it on when they are wasted enough? Do you think I would only join them on occasion, because it looks only like fun when the last bottle is empty?" Jukka got up and moved around the table while he asked all this. Standing in front of Emppu he leaned down and brushed the others hair out of his face, letting his fingertips caress over the skin. "It is all the same by daylight. I want you now as much as I wanted you that night!"

Before Emppu could utter any sound of surprise his lips were already claimed in a kiss. Soft at first, but growing harder in demand, until Emppu had to open his lips and engage in the teasing battle of tongues.

Jukka's hands moved just as suddenly under Emppu's shirt, skimming over flanks and belly, pushing the fabric up as they raised even higher.

When they reached and teased raised nipples the desire to struggle against the seduction overcame Emppu. Not because he felt like he was doing something wrong, but doing it with the wrong person. The feeling lasted for all of two seconds, before his body told his brain to go fuck itself. Emppu's arms reached around Jukka's back to pull him closer.After all, this felt so much realer, was so much better, because he knew here would be no rejection for whatever he would feel.

***

They were naked, and they were in Jukka's bed. It was all about feeling, and touching, and rubbing against each other in all the ways that made his brain swim and his body hum.

And there was Jukka's mouth, so wet, so warm, and best of all, it was all around his dick, sucking him into another dimension of awareness.

"More!" The word was torn from his mouth as a moan when Jukka had the insolence to just stop before it got even better.

"Not yet, my impatient little pixie. We need that nice hard cock of yours for other things in all but a moment." Jukka's voice alone was a pure sensual delight to Emppu's tormented senses. He found himself moaning again as Jukka's fingers pressed against his mouth, and he eagerly opened his lips suck them in.

"That's it," Jukka purred as he pulled those fingers out again.

Emppu had his eyes closed and tried to relax as good as he could for what he knew would come now... just that it did not.  
"Look at me," Jukka said, and so Emppu did.

The older man was crouched over him, preparing himself with his fingers.

One moment to the other Emppu sobered up from his daze of arousal.

"But shouldn't we..."

"No, I don't think so. It will be a lot more comfortable for you if we start out this way around." The fingers left Jukka's body, and he leaned forward to kiss Emppu again, dark strands of hair falling like a curtain over their faces.

"After all you should be used to take someone instead of being fucked!" and with a wicked grin Jukka lowered himself on Emppu's erection.

(14 - Epilogue)

The text message came like a surprise a week later.  
"MEET ME AGAIN" was all it said.

It was the same place as they first met. It was even the same table. But this time it was nothing special.

Emppu and Eicca just sat there, looking at each other, waiting for the other to speak first.

"It doesn't work with us," Emppu finally stated.

Eicca just nodded.

"And there is no need to pretend that we are real friends. So this is good-bye!" Emppu got up and gave Eicca a half-hearted hug before he turned and left.

***

By now the recording was almost finished.

It was just one song that was still missing. So it was no surprise that Eicca found Paavo hunched over a sheet, trying to commit the notes on it to memory.

For a moment Eicca stayed in the door frame, just watching the other before he moved in behind the backrest of the chair. With both hands on Paavo's shoulders he peeking down on the sheet himself.

"Everything alright?"

"No, I need more time for this then I used to," Paavo closed his eyes and stretched his back, letting the warmth of Eicca's hands soak into his muscles. "I am getting old"

Eicca laughed. "Your words, not mine." Feeling bold Eicca leaned in closer, letting his lips ghost over the skin on Paavo's neck. "Is there anything that would make you feel younger again?"

Paavo reached up behind Eicca's head to hold him in place, closer to his neck. "If you ask like that, yeah, I could think of a few things!"

***

Tero's respect for for other peoples privacy was as ever non-existent.

He just ran into the hotel room Jukka and Emppu shared. Finding them on a single bed, kissing with the desperation of a teenage couple in a broomcloset, stopped him dead in his tracks

Letting out a catcall, that was shortly followed by a bout of laughter, he got their attention.

"Didn't I tell you, that you will find everything a lot easier when you search a bit closer to home?" Tero asked once he got his breath back.

"Get out." Jukka said with a grumble, resuming the kissing without wasting another glance at Tero.

"Ah well, I have other people to shock anyway. It has almost been a week since I last ran naked into Tarja's room. Can't let my reputation slip!"

 

The End


End file.
